Monday, June 8, 2009

Darth Ned (PG-13)


This is the edited version of the RP I had with Jezebel. I still haven't had the time to finish it.

***

They slept in each others arms as though they were newly weds. Ryan and Jez, the lustful duo, slept peacefully in each others arms as the world awoke from its sleep. Red, the infamous Naughty French Maid, was fully awake and had the coffee boiling as a fully dressed Tara stumbled into the kitchen. She wore a pink polo and blue jeans as she continued to stumble towards the refrigerator.

"Good morning, Tara. Did you sleep well?" a too perky Red asked the raven haired blue eyed beauty.

"Er, no," Tara replied as she poured herself a large glass of ice cold chocolate milk. She then picked up a chocolate chocolate chip muffin.

"You know, Tara," Red answered as she bounced over, "Overdosing on chocolate is another sign of pregnancy."

Tara ignored the comment, yawned and apologized, "I'm sorry. I had a series of dreams of Jez battling Vader from my galaxy until Ryan untied me." Red nodded her head as Tara continued, "After that it was our up coming mud wrestling match."

Red got even perkier as she sat down next to Tara, "Who won?!?" she asked very excitedly.

Tara shrugged her shoulders, "I don't know-Ryan was too busy drooling over our boobs," she dryly finished with a straight face until she could keep it in no more and snorted a giggle.

Red quickly joined in, Tara and her laughed as a fully dressed IADC Agent Diana Prince strolled in. She sported a loose fitting silky long sleeved creme blouse and a very snug black pair of pants. "That's our Ryan," she smiled as she poured a hot cup of caffeine.

"May the gods bless him," she smirked as she took a sip of coffee.

Suddenly a beaming Jez walked into the door wearing a pink robe, it was tied loosely around her waist. "Good Morning," the glowing super heroine smiled.

The women took noticed on how she glowed, "Morning Jez," they replied as the young heroine walked over to the refrigerator. Jez paused and purred as she turned around, "Ryan is so amazing!"

Tara groaned, "Oh, I'm gonna be sick!"

Red patted Tara's back, "See, that's another sign of pregnancy. Morning sickness."

Tara looked up, snarled a huff, and went back to eating as Jez reached into the refrigerator and pulled out the chocolate milk. She poured herself a large glass and reached for a chocolate chocolate chip muffin.

Diana suddenly stopped drinking her coffee, Tara's eyes widen as Red uttered, "Uh-oh."

"Sweetie, did you use protection?" Tara asked as Diana sat down next to Jez. Red swallowed hard.

"He had is gun on the table, if that's what you mean," she replied as she unwrapped the muffin.

"No, baby," Diana stated as she gently placed her hand on Jez's.

Jez was about to partake in the muffin as she looked around at the three women. It was dead silent. "What?" Jez asked flatly. Dead silence continued to ensue; Jez bit into her muffin and reached inside her robe pocket. She placed her breakfast down and picked up her glass of milk. She flashed a sly smile as she showed a little pill, she smirked and popped the pill into the mouth and swallowed it with chocolate milk.

"Whew!" all three relieved women exhaled as they rolled their eyes. They all shook their heads and fired their eyes at her while Jez smiled a satisfied evil grin.

Moments I stumbled into the kitchen wearing a grey Navy t-shirt and black boxers. "Mornin'" I mumbled as I staggered by. Tara turned and faced Diana as she asked as I pulled out the infamous chocolate milk, "Is he always like that."

"Depends," a some what irked Wonder Woman replied and yelled, "Hello Ryan!"

I winced and replied as I innocently reached for chocolate chocolate chip muffin, "Not so loud, Diana." Next thing I knew the girls burst out in laughter. I didn't know I was that funny, "What?" I asked with my hands somewhat stretched out. "What?" I asked again as they continued to hoop it up at my expense.

The laughing continued until Diana and Tara reluctantly stood up, they had a plane to catch. An eager Red bounced over to the door and opened it; she gave Tara a kiss on the cheek and then Wonder Woman. Diana pulled away and smiled, "Take the day off, Lara's coming over."

"Oooh!" Red puckered her intoxicating lips as she clinched her hands together in utter joy. She was beside herself with joy, she couldn't contain herself; Red gave Diana a big hug. One kiss later she waved them goodbye as Jez and I waved goodbye to Diana and Tara.

Red flashed me a sly smile and ran off. Jez bit her lower lip and smirked; she shook her head and before I knew it planted her tasty lips on mine. I immediately untied her robe, she wore only a skimpy pink thong underneath. I picked her up, carried her over to the sofa, and sat down. She straddled my lap as we continued our torrid kissing.

She slowly pulled away as she cupped my cheeks with her warm hands. Her sensual lips purred away, "Mmm."

My hands caressed her awaiting breasts as I kissed her my reply. She moaned as my hand began to stroke her erecting nipple; my hands gently squeezed her breasts as she broke away and took shallow breaths. She started to breath harder; Jez slowly raised her head and softly moaned, "Stop, Ryan." She continued to labor breathing as she gasped and panted, "Not now, later," she rested her forehead against mine as she grabbed my cheeks.

Jez faced me as she lay her head down in my lap, she closed her eyes as I ran my hands through her hair. She smiled and wrapped the robe around her sexy body.

"You didn't have to do that," I commented somewhat disappointed.

She kept her eyes closed and continued to smile, "I don't want to tempt you. You'll need your strength when Lara gets here."

I laughed, "What if I wanted to give you my strength?"

She warmly smiled as she continued to keep her eyes closed as she purred, "Mmm, such a tempting offer my dear sidekick." Jez wrapped her arms around my waist and continued to purr, "Mmm, I like this."

It didn't last too long, the phone rang. Jez jumped up and answered it, "Hello."

"Jezebel!" the desperate voice replied.

"Yes, Dean Spittle," she said as she untied her robe in one fluent stroke, "How can I help," she finished as she placed her hand on her hip, giving me a nice view of her exposed delicious left breast.

"Ned Sanders is running amok! The campus police can't stop him! We need your help!" he pleaded as I ogled her luscious boob.

Jez rolled her eyes at me and finished, "I'm on my way." She put the phone down, "The heroine formerly known as the Hot School Girl is needed."

I stood up and smiled, "Congratulations Jez, your first mission," as I purposedly brushed her exposed breast with my arm. Jez simply replied by taking a page out of Naughty Red's page: she smacked my butt.

Moments later Jez strutted back in wearing her infamous red thong bikini as she put her red gloves on. My lustful eyes scanned her whole bodacious body. Her red pump laces snaked around her delicate ankle, her panties and bra looked like they did during the Halloween mission. Jez donned her black mask and helmet. "How do I look?" she asked as she struck a pose similar to Wonder Woman's.

Mmm, she looked good, why did she have to wear those gaudy mask and helmet? "I wanna rip your clothes off," I lustfully replied.

She giggled, "All in due time, lieutenant. All in due time," as she walked over to a closet. She opened it and pulled out her trusty M-16 rifle. The smexy rookie heroine slung it over her soft shoulder and walked to the door with me in tow.

I watched her scrumptious sweet rear end swing back and forth as she strutted down the hallway towards the elevator; halfway down she looked down at her gloves and tightened one as I continued to ogle her fleshy pendulum.

We walked in and I pressed the garage button. The elevator began to lower as I wrapped an arm around her and pulled her scantily clad body into mine. She slightly tilted her head as she shot me a curious look. "Wonder Woman and I have this tradition of kissing before a mission; it's for good luck," I stated. My lips were so close to those incredibly intoxicating lips of hers.

Jezebel smiled, "I see," as she placed her soft hand on the back of my head. She pulled me onto those lips and I almost became drunk from them as we slowly kissed a passionate kiss. "Mmm," she purred, "I could get use to this," as she gazed into my eyes.

Moments later we were in the garage, she placed the rifle in the trunk as I opened her door; she promptly smirked, "You're here to enjoy the view, aint ya?"

Boy, does she know me. "Guilty as charged," I replied as I watched her bend over and spread her legs out a little as she sat down. Her breasts bounced as she sat, they continued to bounce as she strapped herself in. I closed the door and walked to my side thinking, "It's good to be the sidekick!"

Jez handed me a little red siren as I sat down. I looked at it for a moment and felt like 'Starsky and Hutch'; I placed it atop the roof and it began to blare as my blue Crossfire screamed from the garage.

Jezebel began to brief me as we stormed towards the campus. "Ned Sanders, salutatorian. He's the nerdy Dungeon and Dragons type. He wears your typical glasses with the tape and pocket protector, no powers. He just a wanna be Batman type hero." She paused and sighed, "He's pissed that Wonder Woman helped me, but what he doesn't realize is that dozens of heroes and heroines helped out others.

Moments later we arrived, she jumped out of the car and walked back to the trunk as I hit the unlock button. Jez grabbed her trusty rifle as I closed my door. The police pulled up their tape line as she neared; I flashed my Navy ID, they nodded their heads and let me proceed. A hysterical Dean Spittle rushed up to Jez, "Jezebel! Ned's turned evil! He demands to be called Darth Ned!"

I snickered under my breath at the name. How can you take a villain seriously named 'Darth Ned'? Jez sighed and asked, "Where is he?"

"The metal shop."

***

The metal shop was deathly quiet as we neared. The campus police had the outside cordoned off as we arrived. I cocked my USN issued 9MM as Jez did the same with her M-16. I grabbed the cold metal door knob. I looked back at Jez, she nodded her head; I nodded mine in return and slowly opened the door. I pointed my sidearm straight ahead as I scanned the room. Jez turned on her laser sight and combed the place with the red light.

"Welcome!" a deep nerdy voice boomed, "I've been expecting you Jezebel!"

I turned to see this "Darth." He was dressed in black leather, boots, cape, and one tacky black over sized helmet. Ned looked more like Dark Helmet of Space Balls than Darth Vader. I started to laugh as Jez sighed, "You got to be kidding."

"Don't laugh at me!" the nerdy wanna be Sith Lord exclaimed.

I laughed even harder as his wimpy voice boomed.

"I said Don't Laugh at Me!" he thundered and balled a fist.

"Sure, Darth...Neddy," I replied trying not to laugh. I caved in a second later and let out of few snorts before bursting out again.

"Ryan-" Jez tried to warn me, but it was too late. Out of nowhere a 2 X 4 kissed my head, cutting a gash in my right eyebrow. I went down hard to the floor; blood oozed from the gash as the room span at super sonic speed. I vainly tried getting to my feet but my woozy limbs rebelled.

Jez scowled and aimed center mass of Ned. She opened fire on him, her M-16 spat red hot empty shells onto the floor as her breasts bounced in perfect unison with the rifle's recoil. Ned laughed as the rounds bounced harmlessly off his chest. Unfortunately Jez had to stop and reload, as she did so Ned opened his hands. Her rifle leap from hers and into his as he laughed a maniacal nerdy, "Nyih-ha-ha-ha! Nyih-ha-ha-ha! Nyih-ha-ha-ha!" Jez looked on in horror as he broke the rifle over his knee; he wasn't supposed to have powers that of rivaling Tara, what happened?

It would get worse for Jez, Ned threw his hand up. Jezebels's arms followed suit, she looked up in disbelief as her arms flew up into the air. A chain hung down from the ceiling and wrapped around her arms. Ned opened his arms, Jez's naughty legs obeyed and opened. She gasped as she looked down at her spread wings, chains wrapped around her legs as Ned continued his nerdy evil laugh.

A sharp cone began to slowly rise up from the floor, it was aimed at her crotch. It grew wider as it climbed towards her. "It will exact my revenge on you and Wonder Woman! It will slice you in half, it'll be pleasurable at first then very painful-WITCH!" he snarled.

"Hmm, wouldn't you want to molest me instead?" Jez asked as she squirmed her curvaceous body. Inwardly I smiled, she was stalling him, taking a page from the superheroine handbook. "Good girl," I thought as I tried to collect my thoughts and gather myself. My head was still spinning as it pulsated with pain; blood oozed into my right eye, blurring what vision I had left.

Alas, Ned took a page from Goldfinger, "No, Miss Jezebel. I expect you to DIE!"

***

Ned removed his helmet revealing your typical nerdy look: Buzz cut blonde hair, glasses with tape on them, and bucky teeth.

Jez couldn't believe that this pathetic piece of crap wanted her to die. As if! She gnarled at him as she saw him looking on in evil anticipation of her being impaled. She took a second glance over at me, noticing that I slightly began to move. Suddenly an idea unfolded in Jez's mind.

"Well Neddy, dear," she purred, "I'm surprised your not taking advantage of having me imprisoned. Don't think I didn't notice how your eyes followed my every move when we had classes together." Jez smiled a seductive smile at him as she gave him a slow deliberate wink. She hit home, she noticed a spark enter his eye as a devious grin appeared on his face. To even imagine what was going on in his head would be too much depravity for even her! "Ryan, I need you...please don't be hurt."

I finally got onto all fours as the blood continued to drip onto the floor. My head felt as though it were full of lead; my whole body wanted to lean forward. I struggled to lift up my head, I managed to look up at Jez as she moved her body for her captor. Her breasts squeezed together as she grinded her legs. Oh how I wanted to get my hands on that little dork.

"Yes, Jezebel," he replied, "But I can I know that you are telling me the truth and not stalling for time as they taught us in school? Hmmm"

"What reason would I lie?" She ask him gently. Her binds have her tightened and her movements are restricted, Jez looked at him licking her moist ruby red lips slowly making sure his gaze followed her tongue. "Maybe we can compromise..."

"Ryan...now's your chance to make a move!" Jez said in her head never taking eyes off Ned; all the while she can still hear the spinning pointed piece coming up further. It was just a meter or more from impaling her.

Ned laughed as he watched Jez's 'Just Dessert' continued to grind closer to her crotch. "Don't worry Jez, I'll be gentle with you and severely punish that Wonder Woman!"

"Gentle?" I thought as I saw that spinning cone climb higher and higher. I picked up that 2 X 4 and closed my burning eyes. My jelly knees held as I made it to my feet.

Neddy stepped into molesting range and put his hand on her right breast and pulled it out. "It's a shame this is going to go to waste."

My eyes narrowed as a scowl formed on my face, this bastard was going to pay. I staggered over to him praying Jez would keep him occupied long enough for me to hit a home run.

Feigning desire Jez groan as he touched her breast. Her cries almost orgasmic, she never lost eye contact with Ned. She licked her lips again and urge him on in a low husky voice, "Yes Ned...more...you're turning me on"

A dull thud sounded as the blood stain wood connected with his head. The board kissed his temple, Ned's world completely went dark as he fell to the floor. I must have done something cause Jez's restraints freed themselves as the machine began to descend back to the floor. I sunk to my knees and took a deep breath as I looked up at two Jezebels.

After being freed Jez ran to me; she completely ignored the unconscious villain and lowered herself to me. She placed her soft warm hand on my cheek, "Ryan, luv! Are you okay, please be okay!" She pulled me tightly pressing my head against her soft breasts as she stroked my wet bloody hair, "I'll call for help in a minute. I just want to make sure you are alright."

Trying to make lite of the situation I tried to crack a joke, "When you find the number of that truck, give me a call." Oh did her breasts feel so wonderful as I lay against them. "Jez," I softly ask, "Can you lay me down, my head's on fire." I closed my eyes in an attempt to vanquish the raging pulsating pain in my head.

"Oh my God, yes!" She exclaimed and lay me on the ground; she gently placed my head down. Rage burned through the rookie superheroine as she got up and walked over to Ned. She kicked him hard in the side, "You piece of filth!" She kicked him a few more times for good measure; she grabbed some rope and tied him up. She drug him to the metal posts and tightly tied him to them. She shoved a piece of cloth in his mouth and sneered, "Serves you right!"

She came back over to me and pulled out my cell and called Wonder Woman. She hung up and sat next to me, Jez gently picked up my heavy head and sat it down on her soft lap. She lovingly stroked my cheek and hair as she waited for help.

I looked up at her and saw her breast covered with blood; I was too dazed to realize it was my blood. "Jez-you're hurt," I stammered as I gazed upon her breast, "Your left breast is cut." I really don't know what transpired after that, I drifted in and out of unconsciousness as I lay on Jez's warm lap.

Jez looked down at her breast and noticed the blood for the first time. She smeared it and reassured me, "Ryan it's nothing, I'm not hurt. You will be okay, I promise you." She slowly caressed my chest with her hand praying and hoping for Wonder Woman to arrive. "Ryan, you have to fight this, Please! Fight! I swear, if you wake up and get better," she pleaded as a tear streamed down her face, "I promise to do anything you want! I'll even...," her voice trailed off as another tear streamed down her face, "Damn, I don't know, but I would do anything if you would just wake up and be well!"

"Con-con-concussion luv," I weakly stammered and smiled, "I'll be okay." I closed my eyes and continued to talk, if you want to call it that, "Just keep me-talk-ing until Diana arrives."

No sooner had I spoke those words when Wonder Woman arrived. "Oh Hera!" she exclaimed. She saw my head laying in Jezebel's lap as Jez stroked my blood soaked hair.

Diana rushed over to us as I turned my head, "Head trauma," I weakly smiled at the two, three, no-four Wonder Women!

"Diana! you have to help....." She pleaded with her mentor as her emotions reached a peak and tears formed in her hurt eyes. "Please Diana! He got hurt helping me."

"It's okay, baby," she warmly smiled as she picked me up. "There's an ambulance waiting outside," she finished. My hand reached out and death locked Diana's soft hand and squeezed as hard as I could as she carried me out.

"You got over confident, didn't you," a smirking Diana asked as I continued to hold tightly to her hand.

"I feel like I want to vomit," I replied as I lay in her warm strong arms.

Diana looked back and smiled, "He's okay, baby."

She ran up behind Diana and frantically asked, "Isn't there something you could do right away? That's why i called you!" Jezebel realized she was in a moment of panic and may be offending Wonder Woman. She just wanted me to be well, she thought it was her fault for me getting hurt.

Diana and Jez walked outside, a gurney was waiting for them. She gently lay me down and pulled Jez aside. She placed her calm hands on Jez's frantic face, she smiled, "He'll be find, remind me to tell you about the time Seaman Kennedy tried to kill him."

I was strapped in and whisked away as the paramedics worked on me. Diana turned her head to see if it was safe; it was, she turned back to her sexy protegee and gave her a reassuring hug.

Jez returned the calming embrace, but still thinking of me. "Oh Ryan," she murmured against Diana's soft cheek as she watched the ambulance drive away with a woozy me in the back, "We have to follow!!!" she implored Diana as she grabbed the Amazon's wrist.

Diana gently grabbed Jez's hand, "Go to Ryan's car. I'll meet you there," she smiled and gave Jez another kiss on the lips. Wonder Woman smiled, "Trust me," and ran away.

Moments later Jez strutted into the emergency room, wearing a black leather jacket and just about that; my dried blood was still smeared on her left breast as she walked towards the counter. Her hips churned away as her sweet grungy thong clad ass swung back and forth as she approached the station and asked as she leaned over, "Wheres Ryan Wolf?!?" Gasps erupted as she continued to lean over, her dirty yet lovely ass stuck into the air.. "Mommy, look at her butt," sounded; parents frantically covered their little ones eyes as they gazed upon her derriere; most of the fathers were drooling as their wives complained in their ears, "Can you believe what she's wearing!"

A stunned nurse politely pointed down the hall, "Down there and to the right."

The fiery red head finally found my room where the doctor was just finishing wrapping me up. "Ryan! You're alive!!!" the jubilant young superheroine smiled, lifting her arms in the air and waving obliviously to the doctor who is now staring at her. She bounced over to me and threw herself on me when she was halted by a loud cough. She looked at the questioningly, he promptly informs her that I was very weak and is not to be disturbed in any way.

"I won't disturb him, I promise!" Jezebel half smiled.

"You're grounded for two weeks," he replied as he gave my luscious friend a stern look, "I want you to see a neurologist next week, get plenty of rest."

He left the room and I wrapped my arms around my sweet friend, "Hello baby, I bet you caused a scene coming in here."

"You have no idea," a soft voice replied. We both looked up and saw IADC agent Diana Prince grinning from ear to ear.

"Diana!" Jezebel exclaimed and jumped into her arms. She leaned over and whispered something in Jez's ear. I don't know what she said, but I had an idea that I was going to be in trouble as the rookie heroine looked back and licked her lips.

"May I go home now?" I asked as I pondered what deviltry they were conpsiring.

Diana snickered and smiled, "Take him home baby, I have to catch a flight to Miami Beach. Pamela Luthor wants to meet with Wonder Woman." She gave Jez a goodbye kiss and flashed me a rather sultry look as she licked her candy apple red lips. "Take care, lieutenant."

An hour or so later The Hot School Girl tucked me in for the night, my pain killers had kicked in. I couldn't lift my heavy head even though it felt as though it was filled with helium. "Goodnight Jez," I weakly smiled.

She leaned over giving me yet another breath taking view of her breasts, "Goodnight Ryan," she replied giving me a soft kiss. Jez stood up and strolled over to the light switch, she turned it off and walked back over to the bed. Without saying a word she stretched her soft body over me and fell asleep.

It's good to be the sidekick!

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